MONEY TALK: Mindset Before Tactics

If you’ve ever been stressed and anxious thinking about your bank account, or even having panic attacks looking at the numbers, you’re not alone. I’ve been there! Looking at my high interest credit card debt with tears in my eyes, internalizing this mistake as a reflection of who I am as a person. Completely shaming myself for not knowing any better (with zero financial knowledge). Y’all. Not good.

So what do we do when we want to make a change, or solve our money problems?

When it comes to finances, it’s important to understand that if you’re not taking care of your money, or being fiscally responsible, you’re more likely to experience higher levels of stress, affecting your overall mental health. And, if you’re like me, you may even internalize a poor financial situation as shame, thinking, “I am bad,” for all of the turmoil it can cause.

I’m no finance expert but I’m here to give you the secret to getting your financial ducks in a row, and it’s this: ABUNDANCE. MINDSET.

As I mentioned, money used to make me cry. Seriously. I couldn’t hold a conversation with my partner about our finances without becoming so triggered that I would cry, lash out and then eventually shut down completely, and I’m here to tell you that this is no way to live.

I knew this just wouldn’t do. And I started with a book, as I tend to do - a book called You Are A Badass at Making Money, by Jen Sincero, and it’s about mastering the mindset of money.

Following the journaling prompts throughout this book and doing the work, helped me change how I FELT about money. Which is the key.

You see, I grew up hearing phrases like… “Money doesn’t grow on trees!” and “How are we going to afford that?!” and “Rich people are evil, selfish, and greedy.” So you can understand how this ultimately shaped my mindset around money.

Through my lens, money was evil, rich people were evil for having it, money was hard to get, money was never around, and when you have money you need to spend it as soon as possible just in case more isn’t coming behind it. Money should “burn a hole in your pocket,” as the saying goes.

Can you see how this would affect the way I managed, or didn’t manage my finances as an adult? I didn’t grow up hearing conversations about saving, or investing, or managing money appropriately, I grew up hearing my parents fight about money, and how there was never enough.

Just like other childhood traumas, and limiting beliefs from the past, this kind of scarcity mindset takes WORK to unpack and dispel. But I believe you can do it, because I did it! And you must, if you’re going to put work into improving your finances, and your overall well being because remember… a poor financial situation is only going to cause you unwanted stress, which affect both the Mind and the Body.

Abundance mindset looks like focusing on what you have, and not on what you lack. I know that’s hard when the numbers are actually struggling, but an attitude of gratitude does go a long way in doing this mindset work.

In You Are A Badass at Making Money, Sincero also walks the reader through affirmations and exercises like writing a letter to money. As I did these things, some of them felt cheesy, I’m not gonna lie to you, but they worked.

Once you can activate a sense of safety within yourself, and develop and abundance mindset, it is SO much easier to then tackle the TACTICS of actually producing more wealth, which, as I have learned over time, is less about making more money (though that certainly helps), and more about how you manage the money you do have.

You have everything you need, you just have to understand how to manage it. But trying to manage money when you feel scarcity, and you feel emotional about money, is not going to serve you. If fact, it’s probably going to overwhelm and trigger you, like it did for me, leaving you feeling stuck and going no where but further down the debt hole fast.

Mindset comes before tactics… with money, with personal development, fitness, nutrition… all of it. Get your mindset right, and THEN hit the play button on HOW.

It will serve you every time.

Be well,
L